Growing up I was told that the key to a healthy relationship was compromise, and while that might sound like the best thing to teach a kid, as a partner and parent myself now, I disagree.
How I understood compromise as a kid was that each person would say what they wanted and the parties involved would take turns giving in to the other person’s want, like a sew-saw back and forth.
The concern I have with compromise being the gold standard of healthy relationships (I know I’m not the only one who was taught this) is that it doesn’t require any true connection.
With compromise as the base of a relationship things stay fairly surface level - and not so healthy. True connection asks us to be available to those we are in relationship with, to listen and communicate with them expressing OUR NEEDS AND OUR WANTS, which is vital to personal and relationship health.
Connection doesn’t ask us to settle, like compromise does, it asks us to reach into our heart space to hear and honor every person in the relationship.
This is why I consider CONNECTION to be THE GOLD STANDARD to healthy relationships.
To a Confident, Sexy, Love filled life!
Kimberly Lindsay, BA, CPCC, ORSCC, IBCLC
Mental Fitness Coach for Spiritual & Creative Moms:
Who are ready to ditch their saboteurs so they can show up
as the partner, parent, and person they want to be - getting back to self and back to roots.